12″x16″, Acrylic paint on stretched canvas
Over the course of my junior year, I have been overwhelmed with the thought of how little I truly know. This, for a time, was a roadblock in my faith, as I often felt unable to approach God simply because of how little I understood about his creation. One evening, during my Bible time, I was reminded of the book of Job. I remembered how frustrated Job was and how he demanded answers for his suffering. God responds to Job’s demands with one of the most powerful descriptions of his creation. Job 39 verses 1-4 says “Do you watch when the doe bears fawns? Can you number the months that they fulfill? Or do you know the time when they give birth? They bow themselves, they bring forth their young, they end their labor pains. Their young ones become strong. They grow up in the open field. They go forth, and don’t return again.” This verse, and the whole chapter, inspired me to create a piece based on the intimate moments in nature that humans never lay eyes on. The goal of this painting was to draw the viewer in to the special moment between the mama and the baby deer. I played with light and with detail to create this effect. Although it was difficult to find references for this painting, it was also an encouragement. It proved to me that these moments were so intimate that few photographers could capture it. This piece challenged me to not rely heavily on one reference photo, but instead to combine what I know about light and nature to paint what I imagined, not what I saw. I pulled inspiration from different artists such as Rosa Bonheur who used farm and forest animals as her subject matter. This piece forced me to trust the process through each and every step, and to love my work despite its incompleteness. I believe that’s what God was teaching me the entire time. While God loves the person I will become, he also loves who I am now, and continues to work on me and to change me day by day as I grow in my understanding of him and his creation.